I have begun the Yoga of Sex
course from the The New School of Erotic Touch
. My first assignment was to observe a daily spiritual practice of orgasmic yoga for thirty days. I've been instructed to journal my experiences. Being the exhibitionist I am, I decided to post my journal entries on my adult blog.
10/29/2010 - Friday - Session 1
My very first orgasmic yoga session was good, but it's hard not to judge. It didn't last long enough. I didn't start coming close to orgasm until the time was up. I went past the end time because I wasn't satisfied. I'm glad I have thirty days to practice this. I want this to be a regular part of my spiritual practice.
10/30/2010 - Saturday - Session 2
My second orgasmic yoga was excellent. I got aroused enough to make plenty of groans and other guttural noises. Unfortunately,I forgot to set the timer. It was good not to run out of time.
I was affirming the presence of God. I was making love to God and he was making love to me. I spoke to God in me through the mirror.
I also talked to (my childhood nickname). That's who I was before I went to school. I love (nickname). Regardless if it's true, the name (nickname) is perceived to be backwards - like a country bumpkin. It wasn't so much my father I was running from, but who I thought that name said I was. Maybe kissing that boy in the first grade is the real reason I hated that name. Now, I love (nickname). Physically and literally.
10/31/2010 - Sunday - Session 3
Today's sex yoga was very intense now that I'm clear on the desire to have sex with God. I have trouble bringing things to a close. There didn't seem to be an end point until I accidentally ejaculated. I really worked up a sweat and was in ecstasy keeping myself on the edge of ejaculation. I think today I forgot to go into a big draw when ejaculation was eminent. I'm also more focused on directing my energy into my heart.
11/1/2010 - Monday - Session 4
I didn't journal about my orgasm ic yoga this morning because I was running late. I had an amazing time. Near the end, I visualized fucking my heart. I could feel my cock penetrate my heart and pump it full of erotic energy. It was so sweet and delicious. I imagined squirting cum all over the inside of my heart, and then rubbing around inside the folds of my heart. I could actually feel it. I get hard thinking about it.
11/2/2010 - Tuesday - Session 5
Today's sex yoga was very nice. I've noticed the sensation that you have just before you cum, that deep contraction in the perineum. Today, I think I was at the verge a couple of times. The first time, I slapped my anus and perineum to interrupt the pattern. The second time I did a big draw. I had very sweet orgasmic feelings as a result. I want to always remember that I can interrupt that ejaculation so that I can focus on the orgasm. Usually, you believe that it's going to happen so you don't try to stop it. Now, I've experienced great pleasure, but I still am not depleted.
11/3/10 - Wednesday - Session 6
Today I my orgasmic yoga, my thoughts got in the way. I was too focused on getting hard and edging for my tastes. After my big draw, I wasn't satisfied so I stroked my dick some more. That was better. I like having a man's body to play with.
Tomorrow I may skip the trance dancing and go straight to self erotic massage. And the day after, do the opposite. Maybe my intention should be to release thought.
11/4/2010 - Thursday - Session 7
Today's orgasmic yoga was delicious. I was able to push out some sperm without fully ejaculating. I stayed on edge a long time and kept spreading the energy toward my hear. I used the cum to anoint my anus, heart and forehead. Near the end, I was still very close to ejaculating when I started looking into my eyes in the mirror. I was able to say “I love you” and I both meant it and felt it. Then I laid back for my final big draw. I unintentionally ejaculated as I was going into the ig draw. I couldn't stop the ejaculation, but I think I can with practice.
When I sat back up, I continued looking at myself in the mirror. I felt detached and objective as I appreciated the beauty of my body. I felt detached in that it feels like there's nothing I couldn't do. I feel like I know my strength.
11/5/2010 - Friday - Session 8
Today's yoga was mostly trance dancing. I was able to feel some erotic energy toward the latter half of the session. I have more difficulty raising erotic energy this way than when I do self erotic massage, but I can see the value and think practicing will help me better raise it in day to day life. I also had a great post big draw experience. I had been using nipple clamps. I took them off just after the big draw. I felt pleasure rising from my taint (perineum) all through my chest. It felt very very sweet. This was much m ore than I was expecting from trance dancing alone.
11/6/2010 - Saturday - Session 9
Today's orgasmic yoga was insightful. The 4T class has been emphasizing not just saying affirmations, but getting into the feeling nature of their Truth. Today, I physically experienced some affirmations: I Am a clear channel for the flow of God within. God's love flows through me into the world I Am the light of the world.
Unfortunately, I had forgot my intention of seeking God in everyone, everything and every situation. But once I did, I began affirming that and looking for that. My fingers and body were tingling and I visualized the healing erotic energy going out from me and healing my partner and his sister. Thank You, God,, for healing my partner and his sister of what concerns them.
In the future, when I imaging God fucking me full of his healing love, I want to imagine it flowing into my ass and out through my cock and hands - raising the consciousness of the world.
Smelling my armpits enhanced the feeling of raw erotic powr and influenced the flow. Very wonderful.
11/7/2010 - Sunday - Session 10
Today's orgasmic yoga session, I was slightly less full of distracting thoughts. Today was erotic trance dancing. I'm having trouble sensing the erotic energy in my torso - even when I have an erection. One of my goals as a sacred intimate is to be able to raise that erotic energy on demand. My big draw was nice deep sensations of pleasure - emotional pleasure.
11/8/2010 - Monday - Session 11
Today's orgasmic yoga was very deeply pleasurable, but I didn't gain any new insights. I've gotten used to having profound moments, that gentle energy - erotic energy - for it's own sake seems ordinary. I want to be able to transmute that physical pleasure into an emotional experience.
I'm behind on my sleep which may decrease my ability to experience pleasure.
11/9/2010 - Tuesday - Session 12
I enjoyed my morning's orgasmic yoga. My intention for this morning had to do with feeling a lack of time. I was feeling overwhelmed. I decided to focus on that and feel it deeply. This session had some remarkable characteristics. I started smiling, I'll explain later.
I laid on my back with a pillow between my legs and pillows laying on my body - my face covered by the sarong. That's when I felt how nice the pillows felt as my dick rubbed between them. I covered myself in my sarong and started doing kegels.
I began rubbing my dick between the chaise and a velvety pillow. I was watching myself in the mirror. I saw myself feeling pleasure and that made me happy and I started smiling. I was full of joy. I was smiling a big toothy grin and letting my tongue hang out. It was just so cool to see myself that it made my sense of joy grow because I realized I was giving myself pleasure and I am worth it.
I ran late because I had a hard time bringing everything to a close because I was feeling so much pleasure. I'm trying to master orgasmic implosions - where you have the contractions that ejaculate semen without having a fully releasing ejaculation. I've done it before on several occasions and it's great to have semen available without deleting all the erotic energy. In trying to achieve this again, I was edging - taking myself close to the edge of ejaculation. I was able to stay right on that edge for a while. It made my penis hard like iron. It was so amazing. I think I ejaculated instead of imploding, but I'm not sure. After I caught my breath, it felt like my penis was as sensitive as ever and I could cum again very easily if I chose. I resisted. This didn't match my earlier experiences, but trying to recreate them is very fun.
11/10/2010 - Wednesday - Session 13
Today's orgasmic yoga, I learned that ejaculation is like gagging in that you can suppress the gag reflex by paying close attention to it and willing yourself to relax the muscles involved and control it. It takes practice, but you can learn over time to postpone or avoid ejaculation.
Today was strictly self-erotic massage. I was able to go past the point where I would normally ejaculate by stimulating myself as lightly (once I was close) as possible and willing myself to relax the muscles in the perineum that wanted to ejaculate.
Unfortunately, even though I knew I had gone past the point of no return without ejaculating - I began masturbating normally again and ejaculated. It takes constant attention to avoid going over the brink. That, I think, is what makes this a meditative practice.
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